Five Wishes, America’s Most Popular Living Will

Aging with Dignity is a national non-profit organization with a mission to affirm and safeguard the human dignity of individuals as they age and to promote better care for those near the end of life.

The life and work of Mother Teresa of Calcutta served as the inspirational foundation of Aging with Dignity. 

 Her tender care and concern for all a person’s needs – medical, emotional and spiritual – served as the inspiration for Five Wishes, America’s most popular living will.

Aging with Dignity introduced Five Wishes in Florida in 1997, and a year later, to the nation. Dubbed “the living will with a heart and soul,” Five Wishes today meets the legal requirements in 40 states and has helped literally millions of people plan for and receive the kind of care they want.

Five Wishes is unique among all other advance directives and living wills because it is user-friendly and easy to complete. The document is available in 23 languages and in Braille.

Five Wishes lets your family and doctors know:

• Who you want to make health care decisions for you when you can’t make them.
• The kind of medical treatment you want or don’t want.
• How comfortable you want to be.
• How you want people to treat you.
• What you want your loved ones to know.

Five Wishes is changing the way America talks about and plans for care at the end of life. More than 12 million copies of Five Wishes are in circulation across the nation, distributed by more than 15,000 organizations. Five Wishes meets the legal requirements in 40 states and is useful in all 50.

Five Wishes has become America’s most popular living will because it is written in everyday language and helps start and structure important conversations about care in times of serious illness.

• Aging with Dignity believes we have responsibility in our society, local communities and families to care for the most vulnerable among us – those who are sick, aged, weak, disabled, poor and isolated.
• Those suffering with a serious illness should not simply be seen as an object on a health care conveyor belt. We should emphasize the things that people say matter the most – comfort, personal dignity, family relationships and spiritual matters.
• There should be a focus on providing quality and dignified care for those struggling with a serious illness so that people will not fear dying alone and in pain. Assisted suicide is not the answer to the challenges faced at the end of life.
• Every adult has the right to make health care decisions in advance of a health crisis. The should be able to convey these decisions in legally valid documents that are easy to understand, allow people to put their wishes in their own words and include matters of the heart and soul.

Next Steps, a guide to discussing and coping with serious illness, is a companion to Five Wishes. The guide includes information on completing Five Wishes, talking to family members about completing a living will and discussing Five Wishes with your doctor.

Included are exact words and phrases you can use to start these conversations. There’s also useful guidance on serving as a health care agent and being at the bedside of someone who is seriously ill.

Although Five Wishes is itself an excellent guide to discussing your wishes in advance of a serious illness, many people find the subject a difficult one to broach with their doctor, family members and loved ones.

The Next Steps guide contains valuable information and assistance in starting, completing and following up on discussions about end-of-life care.

The Next Steps guide consists of four sections:

• How to Talk with Loved Ones about Five Wishes: Next Steps walks you through the discussion. It offers tips on talking with your loved ones about their wishes, as well as suggestions on how to talk about your own Five Wishes with them.

• How to Talk with Doc about Five Wishes: Completing Five Wishes is the first step to making your wishes known; the second is making your doctor aware of those wishes. The Next Steps guide has helpful advice on preparing for your conversation and some ideas on words to use to get the conversation going.

• How to be by the Bedside: If someone you care about becomes very sick or is near death, you may not know what to expect or what to do. The Next Steps guide prepares you and gives suggestions for what to say and how to offer support and love. People who offer comfort at the bedside say it is among the most profoundly moving experiences of their life.

• Answers to Questions about Five Wishes: The Next Steps guide gives answers to the most frequently asked questions about Five Wishes. Like Five Wishes, the Next Steps guide uses everyday language.

One of the best templates is called Five Wishes, which was created by Aging With Dignity …” —Glenn Ruffenach, The Wall Street Journal

“If you can’t speak, documents such as Five Wishes help make clear what relatives should do…The burdens on a family are significantly reduced when the patient has made decisions in advance–for instance, choosing a surrogate to act on his or her behalf by filling out a durable power of attorney for health care.  A living will, also known as an advance directive, helps a proxy understand the patients wishes–and ‘avoids the suspicion that a family is doing something for ulterior motives’…”
—Jeff Chu, Time Magazine

“I recommend getting a copy of the ‘5 Wishes Living Will,’ which is essentially a living will and health care proxy in one. I like it because it’s written in plain English rather than in legalese.”
—Jean Chatzky, NBC News

“‘Five Wishes’ Living Will Aims to Help Families Prepare for the End of Life: The document, written in reader-friendly language, is aimed at prompting people to talk with their families and doctors about something most choose not to talk about: their own death.  With the help of an intensive care unit nurse and a hospital chaplain, Towey drafted a new document that became the basis of the Five Wishes advance directive. The goal is to prompt a conversation among families that is less morbid and less medical than it normally sounds to people contemplating their own death.”
—Don Colburn, The Washington Post

Living Will from Florida Goes Nationwide: “An innovative living will that goes beyond medical questions to deal with personal, emotional and spiritual issues is going nationwide after it was successfully pioneered in Florida.”
—Frank Davies, The Miami Herald

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